Unicycles

So, people who ride unicycles are one of my biggest pet peeves in the entire world.

First of all, women don’t ride unicycles; this is strictly a man thing. (I know, I generalized big time.) As a man thing, you already know it’s idiotic.

Seriously, I do not comprehend the purpose of riding a unicycle. Every time I see someone on a unicycle, I imagine putting a stake in the wheels and watching them fall to the ground while I point and laugh. If you really need to get around, there are many proper options available such as bicycles, cars, buses, or old-fashioned walking.

While I was a student at the beautiful Purdue University, there were three unicycle riders on campus.  One of the riders was genuinely out to piss me off. Not only did he think he was cool for knowing how to ride one, he had an extension on his. Yes, an extension on a unicylce like a carny. He would glide (always with a smug smile on his face) along Purdue’s sidewalks elevated about five feet higher than everyone else.

Here are three reasons why I solemly hate unicyles. 1-I think that people who ride them are stupid. 2-I don’t understand the concept of a flipping unicylce. How the heck do you stay up there? 3-What’s wrong with using a bicycle? I know that these are not particularly good (or eloquently worded) reasons to have such an extreme aversion to unicycles, but I never said it was a rational hatred.

Seriously, get down off that unicycle AND WALK!

H, out.

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This entry was posted in Humor, Random Life. Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to Unicycles

  1. Pingback: Pet Peeves « Hillary's Blog

  2. Pingback: Pet Peeves | TokenBlackTeacher

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